Overcoming your fears
Overcoming Fear of Failure
For the most part, fear is just the anticipation of something bad happening. It can be something real or imagined. It can be rational or irrational.
Usually, the thing that you are afraid of, never happens. It’s all a part of your over active imagination!
There are a lot of things to be afraid of in business building! There is fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of talking to new people, fear of talking on the telephone and fear of your own shadow!
It has been said that you are born with two fears. The fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. All of your other fears you learned along the way. If you can learn to be afraid of certain things, it would stand to reason that you can learn to not be afraid of them as well.
Doesn’t that make sense?
How do we unlearn fears?
The first thing that you must do is to determine exactly what you are afraid of. Let’s take the example of fear of calling your leads. We need to determine exactly what the fear is. Is it that you are afraid of picking up the phone? Are you afraid of dialing their number? Are you afraid of talking to someone new? Are you afraid of saying the wrong thing? Are you afraid that they will say no to your opportunity? Are you afraid that you won’t be able to convince them to join your business?
How Can I Overcome Fear
I know that I’ve kind of broken things down into the components there. Most people aren’t afraid of picking up the phone, although they might say that the receiver weighs 50 pounds. They aren’t afraid of dialing the number. Where the fear starts for most people is talking to someone new. They are afraid of not knowing what to say or they fear saying the wrong thing to them.
I can relate my own personal experience in this kind of situation.
I had a partner in several business (mis) adventures. One of the things we were doing at the time was trying to sell real estate. We chose a target market of apartment dwellers. A certain percentage of them would be looking to own their own home. Our marketing strategy was to put a “First Time Home Buyers Guide” on their doors. We didn’t have much money at that time, so we put them out by hand.
The next step was to cold call them. I had no experience in this. None, zip , zilch, nada! Talk about fear! My exact fear was, not knowing what to say to them. I stared at that 50 pound, pain machine for a good 15 minutes. I took a deep breath and realized that I needed to know what to say to them before I called. Did I need a script? No, I just needed to get the conversation started.
I knew that I needed to know if they were interested in buying a home, soon or not. I didn’t think that it was a good idea to start with that. How could I break the ice? We had just placed our “guide” on their door. I wanted to know if they got it. Wow! What a revelation!
I knew what I was going to say! I picked up the phone and dialed that first number. Was I afraid? Not really. I was somewhat nervous. After all, it was my first cold call. The person answered the phone and said hello. I introduced myself and said, “I am with Such and Such Realty. I had placed a Home Buyers Guide on your door. Did you get that?” They said yes, they got it and they were in the market for a new home. They bought their first home, through us, a few months later.
I was thinking that this stuff is easy! That was after one phone call.
That’s the first way to over coming your fears. You break down the process into as many steps as you can and figure exactly where and what you are afraid of. Then you just need to figure out what to do to make that part of it less intimidating.
I was afraid of not knowing what to say, so I thought up an opening line. It took almost all of the fear out of cold calling.
Overcoming fears by taking action
Here are three things that you can do to help you to overcome your fears by taking action.
The first is to feed your mind on positive information. You can read books or listen to tapes but, I’d suggest find someone else to talk to. It could be your sponsor or someone else in your upline. It could be a group of like minded business builders. They don’t all have to be in your area! You can use Skype to hold an online conference with them. It can be anyone who can help you through the difficult times and who can encourage you to do the things that you are afraid of doing.
How good would it be to have someone to talk to after you call a lead that slammed you around for 10 minutes? It’s much easier to not take things like that personally when you can share it with someone else!
It is very important to fill your mind with positive things. It is also important to eliminate or at least lessen the negative views and information that you may be subjected to. You may need to put a little distance in between you and all of the naysayers in your life.
Second, create a habit of daily action. Consistency is the key to success in anything you do. I would suggest that you write up a to do list every morning. These are the things that you have to do each day! I would also suggest that you add in 1-3 BOLD actions to take. By BOLD, I mean, things that you are afraid to do. It may be something like calling your leads. Or walking up to a stranger and starting a conversation with them. Maybe you want to do video marketing but, you’re afraid of how bad the video will be. It’s time to get started! These will be 3 things that you wouldn’t ordinarily do. Do this at least 2 times per week and after you get used t them add them in on 4-5 days. It will “strengthen” you over time.
It’s just like going to the gym to lift weights. You dread it, especially in the beginning. You know it will be a tough. The next day you are going to be really sore. After a couple of weeks of going, you can feel your muscles getting stronger. You feel much better about yourself. You actually start to anticipate going. You want to keep improving yourself. You want that feeling every day. You don’t have to “make” yourself go anymore. It’s the same thing in business!
As you “workout” your business building muscles, you will get better. You will develop more confidence. You will look forward to meeting new people and talking with them.
Trust me, it will get easier as you do these things.
Lastly, try to live your life outside the box. Take the road less traveled. Do things that others are not willing to do. Take chances. If you want a different life than you have now, then you will need to do things that are not always easy.
Face your fears. If you try, you can overcome them. If you won’t overcome them then your life will go on as it has.
This is your chance to make something more out of your life.
Overcoming your fears is critical to your success.
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